Day in and day out our actions are driven by self-interest.  We will not stay with any activity that isn’t satisfying a self-interest for very long.

How does this affect our effectiveness as members of a team?  We talk about sacrificing ourselves for the good of the team. I do not think that people are basically excited about sacrifice.  We may do it on the short-term but I question whether or not we can sustain sacrifice over the long haul.

Let us examine the whole phenomenon of self-interest.  How we have been socialized since childhood is that self-interest is selfish and being selfish is bad.  Actually, the drive for self-interest ranks right behind food and sex for human beings.

Self-interest is not necessarily good or bad.  It is just what’s so.  Self-interest determines the books we read, the movies we see and the friends we choose.  We may choose a bad book or movie (our evaluation) or have a friendship that doesn’t work out.  Does that make self-interest bad or wrong?

Participation on a team and being a “good” team player needs to be a choice one makes.  And, what has us choose what we choose?  Self-interest, of course.

In order to be an effective team player I may have to compromise from time to time.  The compromise game is “give a little, get a little”.  What we get must satisfy a self-interest larger than what we are giving up.

For example, the coach has a favorite drill which you hate.  (No self-interest).  However, the agreement between the players and the coach is to go 100% in every drill.  Keeping the team agreements allow you to be considered for significant playing time.  Or a raise at the office or a juicy assignment. (Big self-interests).

The compromise is giving 100% to a drill you hate.  What you get is the opportunity to play.  Life is a series of compromises and if you don’t get something for what you gave up you become a victim for having given it up.  Victims are powerless human beings.  Do not give away your power.

Begin to notice for yourself what are the self-interests at work in everything you do.  Be straight about it with yourself.  If you are struggling with something at work, in relationships or any other part of your life it may simply be insufficient self-interest.

Noe the good news here is that self-interest can be created.  In other words, we are not stuck with the self-interests we naturally have.

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Knowing that you can create self-interest doesn’t it make sense that a first priority would be to make the biggest priority I have the team that I am on?  There is very little if anything that we can accomplish for ourselves by ourselves.  Having the best team on the court, at work or at home with family is the best support we can have in our lives.  It isn’t where the self-interests we have are focused.  You make it priority.

For example, when playing on a team there will always be things you like and things you don’t.  (You know, just like at work)  If I have a self-interest called “being the leading scorer” and a self-interest called “winning the championship”  having the best team possible gives you the best chance at both. What your self-interest for having a great team gives you far out-weighs any personal interests you might have.  You cannot get where you want to go on your own.  Never, ever, ever!!!

Even when people do sacrifice there is a self-interest served.  It is noble to sacrifice or people will think I am a good person, etc.  Mother Teresa did not sacrifice to do what she did.  She had a big self-interest.  It is called “making a difference”.  You choose!!