For well over 50 years, I have been working at educating myself and thousands of others. I am clear I have been able to provide most of those others a way to look at life that gives them choices. Then I meet young people who have been educated to be average and … the real bummer, to expect the best. In fact, entitled to have the best.

Don’t take a risk. Don’t live your dreams. As a matter of fact, don’t have any dreams. And, failure is to be avoided at all costs. That’s telling the race car driver to go fast, win, but never put a dent in the fender. We take the primary way to learn and make it so unattractive that we have to lie, cheat or steal to avoid acknowledging it.

We educate people to be reasonable. What I mean is to take the facts of our failures and cover them up, keep them to ourselves or cover them with reasonability. You know, “It was my teammate who dropped the ball,” or “the dog ate my homework” or “I didn’t know or understand.”  You never hear, “the facts are the facts so given that what did I learn?”  If there is nothing to learn, let it go and move on. If I learned something, how am I going to practice what I learned?

It seems to me that parents think their job is to remove the holes from their children’s path. I am not questioning the parent’s style. I am merely saying that life is a series of challenges for each of us and no one can avoid them for you. How about we give them the tools to deal with them as they occur? How about the freedom to be straight about our failures, learn and practice what we learned?

My granddaughter is a college gymnast. To be good at gymnastics you need to learn how to fall (code for fail). Believe me it is a resounding failure.  It is a game of bumps, bruises and frustrations. It is also a game of elation and accomplishment. A real gift.

The only failure in getting knocked down is the failure to get up. Don’t be a victim and just get up. Fail, learn, practice what you learned and achieve. Then, repeat. Life is risky business. Play the game.

And, as always … check out the Coaching Bookstore for more insights on education and how you can learn to become a better coach for your kids and others.